Inner Goddess vs Reality

I think the true, real, inner me is actually a fashion diva.  I haven't been shopping in a while, but usually when I shop, I am in desperate need of an outfit or clothes.  I make a clothing buy out of complete desperation and I usually end up with something that I NEVER wear.  I envision myself being very sleek and well put together and then I see myself in pictures and realize I am wearing mom shorts that give me mom butt.  I've decided that I really need to make a change by investing in real, cool, fashion acceptable clothes....or accept the fact that I'm not and never will be trendy.  Hmmmm...let me think, do some guys find mom butt attractive?

Oh my god...this is what I've become.